OHMYGOD! Anyone who said Labor Day Weekend was a VACATION just was NOT a TEACHER!
I could end this post right now, and anyone in my teaching audience would understand, but for the rest of you, I will go on. (and on, and on, and on...)

To teachers, this is the REAL END. We are so selfish to even gripe, I mean SO often the thought goes through my mind that some people only get 2 weeks of vacation, if that. But we get 10 - yes - 10 - TEN weeks...2x5, 5+5, 5x2, 2+2+2+2+2. (of course it is JUST because I am a teacher, particularly a teacher of third grade teachers who is charged with the responsibility of teaching the "Multiplication Machine," that I write this particular sentence this particular way:)

It is funny because I am pretty sure I approach this last week of "summer" before Labor Day weekend the same way every year. I go into it saying I am going to keep it sacred...I have my days carved out that I am going to work in school, I have a goal for what I would like to do with the week for myself, for my family, and I figure that Labor Day weekend will be mine/ours to spend with myself, and my family and my OWN LIFE...then the inevitable happens. The stress of work begins to poke at my mind. Things need to get done. A classroom that you thought was pretty much good to go is suddenly a complete and utter disaster that you can't even imagine functioning in. You panic about whether or not you did actually copy papers and worksheets that you think you did. You try to go into school and the cleaning staff is working hard and you can't access your classroom...the list is endless.

And these stresses aren't limited to starting back into your classroom routine, they are present at home as well. You suddenly realize all of the home projects that you didn't get done in your 10 WEEKS of time, or that need to be wrapped up. You realize your personal goals for the summer were really only half met, if that. Your kids need school clothes and supplies, physicals, activity sign ups, and, you possibly have family knocking at your door wanting to see you for the "Holiday Weekend" completely unaware that as they are winding down, you are all wound up.

It is complaining, a bit I suppose, because as I said, we do get 10 WEEKS. But boy oh boy, that September 1st pull is strong. It is such a gift that we work in a profession that allows us to renew, and to start fresh each year, but those fresh starts can be tough. In a couple of weeks it will all wind down. We will fall back into our normal school year routines, so familar and comforting. The year will progress and amazingly, May will come, and with it thoughts of another summer. And I suppose that is how the mind has to settle its disrest. There will always be another summer, there is always tomorrow, and what doesn't get done today will still be there in the morning. I hope upon hope to TRY to enjoy these last few moments of summer, and Stress, I suppose it is time for the "Welcome Back!" greeting. It is time to start our complicated little dance yet again:)

- Cheryl

Summer's End

How sad it is to say good bye to summer. It seems as soon as we flipped the the calendar from July to August, the smell of fall in the air was detectable.

Now it is time to start thinking of cooler air, back to school, back to WORK and a regular routine. How lucky we are to have a job which has a definite start and stop cycle. It gives us a chance each year to start NEW.

As we wind down this last week, I hope to relax and regroup before heading back. I wish I were able to carry over some of my summer routine into the back to work mode. Like NOT DOING my HAIR! All summer I just wash n go. I think it looks fine...even GREAT sometimes...but once September comes, out comes the blow drier, flat iron and hairspray. Its like my hair knows it isn't summer and WON'T behave with the wash n go treatment. Half assed up dos with clips look great all summer, but try to pull that off at work? NOT...

Oh well. I guess it is just one of those things.  

An image to help us retain that Summer Zen!
(Do keep in mind, to further that Zen, that there were VERY CUTE surfer boys out on those waves when I took this photo...just too far away. I NEED a telephoto!)

- Cheryl

OK, Sue is kicking my butt on this blog and I have to get in the game it seems! We're at the tail end, though, you know, of summer vacation...the teacher's golden egg. There are many teachers that work in the summer, and goodness knows the salary, in particular at SOME districts which will remain nameless, could use some augmentation. Still, I tend to subscribe to the money vs. time philosophy. Could I make more money in the summer, sure, but the regular school year gets so hectic. Summer is my unwind time, my creative time, time to play with my family and friends, time to tan and travel and cook and shop, time to read, and time to write. I mean, look at this blog. We'd never have started this with school year responsibilities piled up, but with summer relaxation in full swing, look what happened! We have a great thing started. To me, TIME is of equal, or perhaps higher importance to money, for the most part.

Time and money and salaries aside, though, we still have not uncovered why Sue is posting away, leaving me in the literary dust. Well I'll tell ya why, she is still on summer vacation! Me, oh joy of joys, I got to go in to work with my grade level team for the last two days. Now granted, the days were paid, and another teacher phenomenon is the whole "How are we making the money last until the first Sept. paycheck" dance, but paid at what cost? The cost was that I INSTANTLY ended my summer Zen as soon as I walked in that door.

Which leads me to a question. Why is it that it takes us so long to relax into summer vacation, or any vacation, but that we can spring right back to work mode with the flip of a switch? After the last two days, I am right back where I was in June... I have had this happen repeatedly to myself and have seen it in others firsthand. Vacation is coming, so you work like a dog to be sure you are caught up at work, or ready for the holiday the vacation encompasses, only to get sick over the vacation and lose half of your time. Or there is the option of travel while on vacation from work, which involves an inordinate amount of preparation, encompasses a tremendous amount of stress what with today's travel costs, restrictions, etc, and which produces, in the end, a more exhausted person than the one that left work in the first place. What was meant to refresh and replenish, exhausts and depleats...it is the classsic, "After my vacation I need a vacation." Still, we jump right back into our jobs and responsibilities with flawless precision, dog tired, but performing even in our collective states of fatigue. If only we could jump to vacation mode as quickly as we jump back to work.

This year at school that is my goal. I suppose I should alert my principal, that although she has my APPR goals neatly typed up and ready on her computer, and while her back to school letter outlined all of our "glorious" building goals for the coming year, I have a little something else in mind. I am going to TRY really hard to hold on to my summer glow. I am going to bitch less and laugh more. I am going to work hard, but remember to relax as well. I am going to do what I can each day, remembering that a day has a finite number of hours and I am only one person. And most of all, I am going to try to internalize Sue's and my philosophy so as not to get so busy in my career that I forget about my LIFE! You know, if I can really make it happen, what a gift to me, my friends and family, and ultimately, what a better teacher I will be. Only time will tell...

- Cheryl

What is that word...that means when 2 things contradict each other? I am having an issue here and need a thesaurus or something. Is there one of these on this blog? Where is my college thesaurus anyway...Okay...I just looked up what I thought was the word on Webster.com and I was correct. Oxymoron. When 2 things contradict each other, like cruel kindness. Yep. Oxymoron will be tonight's reflection...

Anyway, that is tonight's topic. Those contradictions can sometimes be a pleasant surprise, as this photo depicts so well. There is a little girl dressed to perform a ballet, placed in a setting so far removed from any stage. Instead of an audience, we see cows. Instead of a bouquet of flowers cradled in her arms, a flowering plant hangs above her. For all these reasons, I love this photograph. But what happens when these things don't work? When they make us feel uneasy? When something about them just isn't right?

Like a GREEN flag flying high on a flag pole at school telling kids to JUST SAY NO! to drugs on our drug awareness day. Something about the color green tells us to just say YES! Green is relaxing...green makes us feel good, green is money, luck, parties and fun. If drugs come along and are offered when we are amongst so much green, where is the warning? Where is our RED LIGHT? I cannot say at that moment that I would just say no. The green JUST SAY NO flag just did not work for me.

Yesterday, while sitting outside the YMCA, waiting to pick up my daughter from camp, I watched a woman in her late 30s, wearing a YMCA HEALTH AND FITNESS STAFF t-shirt slowly work her obese body up the stairs. Something about that made me very on edge. What message is this? That working out isn't really the answer? That the staff here couldn't possibly help us attain our ideal weight and strength because, after all, look at how they look themselves? It is like going to a dentist with decayed teeth or to a Doctor who smokes. Something just doesn't feel right here!

My favorite was the conversation I overheard between 2 older ladies at JCPenney yesterday. They appeared to be in their early 60s perhaps. A tad on the heavy side, but well dressed and smiling. The lady in blue said hello to the woman in coral, whom she had not seen for some time. Blue remarked to Coral how well she was looking and complimented her tan. Ah, the tan. Looking great while killing us at the same time! But then the contradiction. Coral said that she knew she really shouldn't be out in the sun...as she was just finishing up a round of CHEMO!!! She had had cancer and been declared cancer free, but then some returned and she had to begin again. How sad!

But as I watched Coral, all dressed up and perfectly accessorized, she was happy. She was upbeat, she was getting better, and she was TAN. She'll beat this cancer again I am certain (and it was not skin cancer on a side note)...she is the little girl in the yellow tutu, on her imaginery stage with her farmlife audience. Isn't that the kind of contradiction we all need in our lives?

Reflecting on New Motherhood

I can remember the arrival of my first child into the world like it happened yesterday. My second actually seems like longer ago than the first.

The first was a fairy tale delivery. The labor every woman dreams of. Fast with some cramping, then pushing and 4 hours later, a baby to hold! This all happened between the hours of 8:45pm and 12:44am. I never slept that night. Filled with excitment and questions of what just happened, and was that really labor? Then the stream of visitors to the hospital. First grandbaby on both sides of the family.

That night I was ready to crash, but I felt pressured to give nursing a try which seemed like an every 30 minute ordeal. I figured that I could sleep when I went home the next day. Babies sleep a lot, right? Sleep when the baby sleeps was the advice everyone gave.

He came home on a crisp fall day. I should have known something was in the air, as he was born on a hot and humid summer night, just 2 days before. Everything had changed. I walked up the driveway a different person than I had walked down it just 2 days ago. I look back on the first 4 weeks of his life as hellish and a complete absence of sleep. I learned that post partum depression is more than just crying about nothing, or feeling a little sad when you should really be happy. For me it meant wanting my body back, wanting to sleep, wanting to be a human again. I knew I hit rock bottom when my husband came home from work 2 weeks into the motherhood thing, took one look at me and said, You really don't like him, do you? I broke down crying because ya know what? I really did not like him. He refused to sleep more than a half hour at any given time, refused to nurse, and basically cried between all of that. I handed my husband the baby and went and packed up the breast pump. I was done. I couldn't wait to wake up (from a half hour sleep of course) dry, fit into my normal bras, and not spend hours pumping only to pour it into a bottle to feed to him.

Then there was the issues of visitors. During his first couple weeks...people came out of the woodwork to visit. Not at the best hours or on the best days. I think I can even recall hiding and pretending that we weren't home for one visitor. When one visitor called to ask when would be a good time, I told her in 10 months? I was serious...but she laughed and came an hour later bearing a seasonally inappropriate outfit and a basket of scary bath gels for me. I was in no mood to visit. My favorite visitors were my husband's friends we had not seen or heard from in 3 years. They had heard through the grapevine that we were expecting, and thought they'd drop in to see. Weren't they excited to be able to see the baby on just our second night home from the hospital! They showed up at 8pm and stayed till 10pm. I was exhausted and very pissed off.

Of course things settled a bit (just in time to return to work and take him to a babysitter!) and I got glimpses of what it was like to enjoy your baby. I was allowed a small chunk of sleep here and there and granted myself a hot shower and at least a blow dry a day, whether he was crying or not.

Baby number 2 joins the life you already have in progress, as opposed to your joining the life of your first. There were other issues going on and that is a separate blog posting, but all in all the second, the girl, was much smoother.

Since becoming a Mom, I have become an aunt to 3 nieces, the 3rd being born just over a week ago. She lives a couple of hours away with my brother and sister in law. I haven't been able to see her yet, due to logistics, life and their own new parenting jigsaw puzzle they are trying to sort through. My brother emailed me just last night to cancel our planned visit today to meet her, due to exhaustion and plans to catch up on sleep and pumping. While a bit hurt, and saddened, I can recall all too well the feeling of wanting the world to go away and just be able to find a piece of myself again...

Today's commentary...pencil leg jeans.
As Sue mentioned, we refer to ourselves, currently on an amature basis, as opinions for hire, and quite frankly, I wish the fashion industry had consulted us before bringing back the 80's. I mean, come on, did we really need to go back to the pencil leg jeans, and leggings? Just the other day I was at the mall and they were EVERYWHERE, along with ripped stuff a la Flashdance, deep V neck "shaker" sweaters, and I am sure I saw a glimpse of Neon fabric before I had to leave, muttering under my breath in disgust. Now, I will be the first to admit to the comfort of these styles, but is comfort really where we are headed. I had JUST gotten used to lower rise jeans, and more form fitting clothes...and had actually come to like them quite a lot. Lower rise and a bit of a flare leg does WONDERS for a girl with hips, particularly a TALL girl with hips. You all know what I mean. And we won't even go into the whole concept of stretch in jeans and the fact that I will need at least a week of leave time from work and indefinite therapy should THAT style trend go by the wayside. And, at the age of 35, to be pretty comfortable, finally, with my body, and wear snug things that SHOW that I am female...well it was a BIG step from a girl who dressed through the 80's. NOW they are trying to put me back in the pencil legs and leggings, which a "girl with hips" MUST wear with a long, formless tunic in order to be DECENT. WHY I ask you all, WHY?
Maybe I ought to look into therapists a bit today...just a thought...

- Cheryl

So this weekend, Cheryl and I decided that we have such a wealth of knowledge about an unlimited arena of topics, that it is a shame to keep all of that between us. We need to open a consulting firm. We can offer the cut right to the point version for a minimal fee, or we can ease in with the here's what you're doing right first before cutting into the criticism, at a slightly higher cost.

Yesterday we visited several wineries in the Finger Lakes area. We had several pointers at the very first place we visited. It was an impressive mansion of a building overlooking Seneca Lake, with beautiful decor. But the help was new, and needed some training before she should have been allowed to pour wine. The tasting options given were divided into 4 categories from which you chose one, which were quite confusing because some contained 2 of the same wines that were in other categories. It was way too confusing and the wine taster really just wants the educated wine expert to just go down the list and tell you what is what. Needless to say, there was only 1 bottle purchased there.

We liked the winery that was laid back and fun, with flirtatious young men surving up the wine, with coupons given towards purchases made there. Several bottles and T shirts were purchased there.

Moving on to a wedding reception today...several things were pointed out in need of attention. No salt and pepper placed on the tables, candles were not lit prior to the bridal party's arrival, only one napkin being provided per table. There were some serious things going on here. Because there was no offical request for the consulting service, we simply just called these out as observations.